Hot Summer Days

Wildflowers in Pierre Marquette State Park, Illinois

These are my favorite days.

So far today I have mowed the grass, dressed unused flower beds with fresh straw for our cats, made herbal tea from herbs that I grew and dried sweetened with local honey from my BIL.

Now I’m cooking yellow rice to go with the beans I have already cooked.

For lunch, I had a salad with raw spinach, cilantro, a little pickled cabbage, pumpkin and sunflower seeds, and my guilty pleasure – Ranch dressing. Topped with peanuts for more crunch.

I stretched and limbered up in the sun, in the backyard, in the freshly mowed grass.

I have been missing feeling strong. I’m beginning to feel strong again.

Now, back to my glass of herbal tea with lime.

I love hot summer days.

Presents to myself, from myself.

Holiday presents to myself, from myself.

She’s outside feeding the chickens

She’s outside feeding the chickens, checking the garden, and greeting the wild animals – the birds, squirrels, lizards, and the cats. She goes inside and grabs another cup of coffee and goes back outside, while it’s still cool and the bugs aren’t too bad.

She has about thirty minutes before she has to get ready for work. She sure wishes she had more control over her work, her day, her life. Two – or even three – days off in a row would be nice. Or even the same start time every shift would be nice.

But she doesn’t have that kind of job.

She likes working with the public anyway. Different faces everyday is nice.

She also wishes the pay was better. Worrying about money is unnerving. Living in fear of the future takes all the fun out of life. Not to mention what if she gets sick? Will doctors even be able to help or will she begin the rapid descent into death or disability?

See, there’s a lot to worry about. She’s not a spring chicken anymore.

If she gets “put” into a nursing home, it will be a sad, sad day. She may not be able to forgive her children for it.

So many worries. The weight of her world gets heavy.

Where did the fun go?